Wow what a year! 2009

This year has been quit an eye opener for me in terms of relationships, friendships, career, family and traveling.

My highlights for this year have been:

1. Going to London, Paris and Amsterdam - it has really given me itchy feet to do some much more of it.

2. Getting to know and trust my partner more, loving everything about her, opening myself up just a little more ( I highly recommend this!) to know that long term relationships can be fulfilling.

3. Getting to know my cousins again, they have been living in England for years and I never see them.
Seeing my aunt and re-connecting with her, I am so glad to have a family member in my life who just knows me.

4. Achieving in a course, learning that I can learn, truly getting back into the studying after a long while.

5. The wool being pulled from my eyes, seeing things clearly in terms of my work and what I want from my career, realising that people can be such users, can hurt, can undermine and can put down how strong I have become? I realised that I too need to be appreciated and that I too matter!

6.Being able to maintain my weight somewhat as a person who battles with the bulge.

7.Creating new friendships and ridding myself of the friends that do not contribute positively to my life.

8.Learning how to stretch my money further this year with the recession.

9.Learning that when things get tough not to throw in the towel. Just keep going.

10.Learning that in your 30's perspective seems to come into focus.

Lets say goodbye to 2009, hoping that 2010 will be far better and more goals reached, let 2010 be peaceful, prosperous, healthy and loving!

Don't you just love Dilbert Quotes!

Boredom and no enthusiasm for work does wonders for internet searches, found these great quotes from "Dilbert"

1. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.
2. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
3. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
4. Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.
5. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time, chances are you won't be needing him again.
6. I DON'T HAVE AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM, YOU HAVE A PERCEPTION PROBLEM.
7. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, "where the heck is the ceiling?"
8. My reality cheque bounced.
9. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
10. I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.
11. You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
12. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
13. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
14. Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level, and then beat you with experience.
15. A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the butt.

16. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
17. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.
18. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
19. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
20. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
21. If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
22. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
23. Following the rules will not get the job done.
24. When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"
25. Only the mediocre are at their best all the time.
26. There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
27. Bring ideas in and entertain them royally, for one of them may be the king.
28. If at first you don't succeed......skydiving isn't for you.
29. Life is a waste of time; time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.
30. When everything is coming your way......you're in the wrong lane.
"Lately the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labour."
- Dilbert
31. "You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter."
Short Funny Quote by, Dilbert.
32. “As you gain experience, you’ll realise that all logical questions are considered insubordination.” – Dilbert advises Asok the Intern
33. “There are two essential rules to management. One, the customer is always right; and two, they must be punished for their arrogance.” – Dilbert
3.4 “Frankly I’m insulted that you asked me out. It means you think we’re about the same level of attractiveness.” – Dilbert’s date
35. “It looks like I’ll be exaggerating my accomplishments again this year.” – Dilbert
36. “Why aren’t you signed up for the 401K? I’d never be able to run that far.” – Dilbert
37. “When you grow up you’ll be put in a container called a cubicle. The bleak oppressiveness will warp your spine and destroy your capacity to feel joy. Luckily you’ll have a boss like me to motivate you with something called fear.” – Dilbert

Do we have "Pride"

This weekend was the Gay/Lesbian etc Pride Parade in Johannesburg, South Africa. I attended as I always do every year and have been for the last 9 years.
This year was different, I have gotten to a stage in my life where I have been questioning everything from religious/ spiritual views to the cloths that I wear.

This year I asked myself, Why do we attend Pride? is there a reason for us to still be seen to still show a presense?

Personally my answer is YES! although South Africa has a democratic and tolerant constitution, we still need to show our presence as it is constantly threatened. It seems that people just don't want to leave us gay/lesbian people be.

We march for people in countries who can't march, people who cant kiss their lovers or show affection to someone they love in public without experiencing the bigotry, wrath or even a death sentence.

We march as a reminder that our rights can be taken away from us at anytime a government or state decides to.

We march in memory of those lost in violence because they were different and did'nt want to conform.

We march in solidarity with our family who became our "family" when some of our own family rejected us for wanting to live a life true to what we deserve.

We march because as a whole this is still a homophobic society and world that we live in that fear difference and non-conformity. Where minorities are still beaten and killed for no reason.

We march because the rest of the world see's the rainbow flag as a reminder of sin and immorality that ruins lives and devastates families.

We march for THE FREEDOM TO LOVE WHO WANT TO LOVE!

I personally feel that some of the community seems to forget why we march and why we celebrate and it saddens me.

Alcohol and why do we drink so much of it?

Research provided me with some information of this drug:

Method of use:
Liquid which is swallowed

Scientific / Trade or Slang Name
Ethanol, Ethyl Alcohol, Booze, alcohol brand names, beers, wines, spirits, liqueurs.

Do you know the short term effects of Alcohol?
Effects may last several hours. Intensity and speed of onset increased if alcohol is concentrated and stomach empty. Half a pint of beer, a glass of wine and a single whiskey contain the same amount of alcohol. Known to cause clumsiness and impaired judgment.

And the long term effects?
Heavy drinking is associated with increased risk of strokes, liver disease, high blood pressure, infertility, diseases of the nervous system and strong physical dependence. Withdrawal after very heavy use can involve delirium which can be fatal.

How long does it stays in your system?
Lasts in your system approximately one hour per unit consumed. There are approximately 2 Units in a regular Pint of Beer.

Here is an interesting fact about alcohol:
People who regularly drink alcohol are three times as likely to die from injury as are non-drinkers and former drinkers of alcohol, according to new research from the Center for Injury Research and Policy at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health.
The Hopkins researchers examined the relationship between usual drinking behavior and the major categories of injury: motor vehicle injuries; unintentional falls, fire deaths, drowning and poisoning; suicide by poisoning, firearm and hanging, strangulation or suffocation; firearm-related homicide; and other homicide.

So why do we as a community drink so much knowing the full effects of this drug?
Here are my reasons:

Impaired judgement: which can sometimes be a good thing, I mean how else are we meant to get lucky?

Loss of inihibitions: which is also not a bad thing, really except when you wake up with the “cayote ugly feeling” of the girl lying next to you or the several girls lying next to you. Drinking does have the effect for reducing that initial shyness of introducing yourself.

The ability to make new friends: ever gone to a party realising that you know absolutely noone? Then people start drinking and all of a sudden you are surrounded by new best friends! How wonderful especially if you are an introvert.

The “truth” drug: I know a lot of girls, once they start drinking, they start talking and they don’t stop, lucky for some I am a loyal friend and can keep secrets, but for the rest of these women, information can sometimes fall into the wrong hands.

To take the “edge” off, because we enjoy it?: This is the main reason that we drink, gay people just love a good party! We love our dinner parties! We love our braai’s and get togethers where we relax with our friends, what is a party without drinking people interesting, or exciting or cute?

My point is, drink if you want to, I do. Have a good time, just take care of yourself and the people you care about and that care about you!
AND JUST REMEMBER EXCESS ALCOHOL LEADS TO THOSE NASTY HANGOVERS THAT SEEM TO LAST FOREVER AND I HAVENT FOUND A DECENT CURE YET!

SHE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU! - HOW DO YOU KNOW?

I watched the movie “He’s is just not that into you” and I began wondering, what are the signs for the girls? What are lesbian signals for “She is just not that into you”!
Here are a few of my own:
“She likes you, as a friend”
do we look like we date for our health? If we wanted more friends we would not have asked her out, how many times have you heard the words “lets just be FRIENDS”?

“She tries to set you up with another woman”
This is to make sure that you don’t hit on her or alternatively it didn’t occur to her to want to date you! By the way this still puts you in the “friend” category.

“she doesn’t laugh at your jokes”
Either she doesn’t find your sense of humour funny or perhaps she doesn’t like you enough to pretend that your humour is funny!

“She cancels plans or is vague about them”
If she really wanted to see you she would see you, she would cancel her other plans. The vagueness implies that perhaps she is waiting for something, sorry, better to come up.

“you are always the one calling her, she is never the one calling you, she never returns emails or text messages or voicemails”
She isn’t that into you, woman love communication especially telephones! (well generally we do) its obvious that keeping in touch with you or getting together with you is not that important, how many times has this girl said that she forgot, or that she was busy and you bump into her on the night she told you she was busy?
Here is a rule, if she doesn’t return your first call she might be playing hard to get, call her a second time if she doesn’t return that call she is JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!

“Body language”
If the girl doesn’t make eye contact for more than 3 seconds, or perhaps moves closer to your proximity or makes an excuse to touch you, either she is shy or she JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU! especially if you try move closer to speak and she makes excuses, talks to other people moves away or uses her friends as barriers to protect her from you.

“ I am not ready for a relationship”
Usually means “ I am really don’t do relationships” “I am still getting over my ex” or very often it means “ I DON’T WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!”
“She mentions other girls or girls she is attracted to”
And none of these girls are you or remotely resemble what you look like. Could mean that are really not her type.

“She is a complete flirt”
Constantly flirting with other women in front of you is just rude even if you are just a date. It’s shows a lack of respect for you! she obviously doesn’t think that you are worth flirting with. Move on girl!

“She keeps her place private”
some women are more private than others. She might have a strong sense of personal space and needs more time before allowing you alone in her apartment. On the other hand, if you've been dating for a year or two and she still won't let you stay there alone, I'd say she's hiding something.

“she hangs around with her ex more than she hangs around with you”
Yes, I know that some girls befriend their exes and we all have best friends but when you are dating someone that you are really into, the honeymoon period does set in and friends do take a back seat.

These are generalizations, my advice would be to listen to your gut! And have some self love, there are plenty women out there who are just waiting for that right girl to walk into their lives who will love you and cherish you just as you are!

Grief and Loss

It’s so strange they say that getting divorced is quite similar to death except that with death you never get to see the person again and don’t get to talk to them about the things left unsaid.
As a lesbian, I am not sure why straight people think that getting divorced or going through a break up is any different to the heartbreak that that they experience and go through after all we are all human.
We all have to go through that grieving stage when it comes to loss, fortunately I haven’t experienced much of death but I have been through a divorce and a loss of a relationship.
There are 7 stages of grief. If we get stuck in one stage or the other, the process of grieving is not complete, and cannot be complete. Thus there will be no healing. A person MUST go through the 7 stages to be well again, to heal. Not everyone goes through the stages at the same time. It is different for each person. You cannot force a person through the stages, they have to go at their own pace, and you may go one step forward then take two steps backward, but this is all part of the process, and individual to each person. But, as stressed, ALL 7 stages must be completed for healing to occur.
1. SHOCK & DENIAL-
You will probably react to learning of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.

2. PAIN & GUILT-
As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.
You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn't do with your loved one. Life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.

3. ANGER & BARGAINING-
Frustration gives way to anger, and you may lash out and lay unwarranted blame for the death on someone else. Please try to control this, as permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the release of bottled up emotion.
You may rail against fate, questioning "Why me?" You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way out of your despair ("I will never drink again if you just bring him back")

4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS-
Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be "talked out of it" by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.
During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you did with your lost one, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair.


5. THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to life without your dear one, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But you will find a way forward.
7 stages of grief...
You will start to look forward and actually plan things for the future. Eventually, you will be able to think about your lost loved one without pain; sadness, yes, but the wrenching pain will be gone. You will once again anticipate some good times to come, and yes, even find joy again in the experience of living.
.
My personal experience is getting the closure with a divorce, knowing that you can meet up with the person or people and feel at peace with no feelings of anger, hurt depression or negativity.
Feeling complete, that if it wasn’t for them you wouldn’t be the person you are today and thanking them for what you learnt from the time that you spent with them.

The gay and lesbian rules

Not that we agree with all of it, but here goes:

Every gay guy should own or have watched Beautiful Thing.
Every girl should own or watch “Boys don’t Cry”

Bad hair days are not something that can be allowed to happen to a gay man. Lesbians are, of course, exempt and even encouraged to think otherwise.
Bad hair days happen to lesbians too! Lucky we look good in hats, caps and other head accessories!

It is a gay man's right to get invites to both the Hen and Stag nights.
It is a lesbians right to get invited to both Hen and Stag nights.all lesbians should have an entourage, a group of friends, they love and hate at the same time

When spreading rumours it is okay to exaggerate the truth, as long as it makes the rumour more interesting. for sure! And as long as it’s not about you!

It is okay to be late; the heterosexuals just expect it from us. Don't make another homosexual wait too long though because it's a miracle that they are even ready on time.

When out, it is your legal duty to distract the ugly friend of some hottie with whom your best friend is trying to score. Should you get carried away with your good deed and end up having sex with the beast, your friend is forbidden to speak of it.

Similarly, you should always rescue a fellow homo from the clutches of any undesirable. Put your arm around him and act as their boyfriend./ girlfriend

When out, you are expected to sing along to every Britney, Christina, or Madonna song and to know every word.
For the girls K.D. Lang, Melissa Etheridge and The Indigo girls will do!

Before dating a fellow homo's ex, you are required to ask his permission. If they say no you are allowed to date them anyway.
For the girls as long as the said ex only finds out at least 3 months later!

Straight men who say they're okay with gay people but don't try to hook up with them need to be watched closely because they can't be trusted. –
for the girls – watch out for those female colleagues who want to tell you their life story, including their one and only lesbian experience as well as the unexpected lesbian ones!

If a homo's zipper is down, reach in and give his willy a shake.
Girls if a girls zipper is down and if she is hot make sure you let her know, buy her a drink and ask for her number as she should oblige knowing that you have saved her from utter humiliation and embarrassment

When a homo asks you to help him move house laugh in their face.
For the girls – when asked to help move house – bring the bakkie, a couple of butchies and beer let’s do this!

A straight guy who is drunk is still considered off limits even if he is coming on to you like a two dollar whore. –
a married, straight hot woman with 3 kids and a body to die for is off limits (unless she promises to divorce said husband and give you the full parental rights !) and even though she is hanging on your shoulder, holding your hand, and coming onto you like a two dollar whore!

Nevertheless, spooning drunk straight guys is not only acceptable, but strongly encouraged. –
cuddling, the said drunk hot married women with 3 kids and the body to die for is acceptable!

Only drink fruity chick drinks. Drinking beer is for hetero men and we're above that.
Never drink fruity chick drinks – those are for the homo boys, Whiskey, Beer and tequila shooters are the way in to being accepted to the lesbian parties!

When fighting a fellow homo degrade them verbally till you can't anymore and then commence hitting like a girl. –
When fighting a fellow lesbian – be sure to always throw the 1st verbal insult followed by a punch in the nose, make sure she is down and can’t sue you for assault!

Thou shall worship Karen Walker.
They shalt worship Ellen Degeneress

Honour thy fag hag. –
Honour thy “Let pet”

Do not sleep with your fag hag's boyfriend. If and only if he makes the first move, making out and copping a quick feel are acceptable.
Do not sleep with your “Let Pet” or said “Let Pet”’s girlfriend, occasional drunken making out is acceptable – make sure that they know not to fall in love with you!

Never hesitate to reach for the last anything. We're gay and we deserve it.

When in the bathroom it's OK to sneak a peak at your neighbour’s goodies, just don't get caught!
When in the gym it is ok to peak at your neighbours gorgeous goodies, just don’t get caught!

Do not take the name of Cher in vain.
Do not take the name K.D. Lang in vain!

Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat on his boyfriend, you must attempt to get a piece of the action or swear you'll tell his boyfriend.
Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat on her girlfriend,expecting said friend to take you out for breakfast for the next 3 months is acceptable.

The morning after you and a fellow homo who was formerly "just a friend" have drunken doggie sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to do it again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was.
Girls – do not MAKE A DECISION DURING OR AFTER P.O.G (post orgasmic glow) let the feeling subside and make sure you are sober before you ask the “just a friend” to move in, marry you or have your children next week!

Don't hit on straight guys. This rule is null and void if the straight guy in question is making homophobic remarks or just being a dick in general and needs to be put in his place. In this situation a light slap on the ass is acceptable.
Do not hit on straight chics. This rule is null and void if the straight chic is making bad lesbian jokes, singing I kissed a girl and liked it or simply just being a total bitch. A small boob brush is acceptable!

Under no circumstances shall a gay man ever shop at Mr Price.
For some of the girls its ok to shop at Mr Price due to the fact that we earn much less than the gay men!

It is perfectly acceptable to mock straight men for sleeping with women. The same is not true for lesbians as they are the bodyguards of the gay community.

You should aim to be fluent in one of the following subjects: fashion, dance music, show tunes, or interior decorating.
A lesbian should aim to be fluent in the following subjects: Plumbing, Mechanics, Electronics or Woodwork

A significant period of time without gay sex may result in being downgraded to simply "amusing". Or perhaps straight!

You may not call someone your boyfriend unless he is also aware of the fact that he is your boyfriend.
You may not call someone your girlfriend unless she is also aware of the fact that she is your girlfriend and definitely do NOT call her a girlfriend until such time as you have “connected on all levels”!

There is a statute of limitations on being "bi-sexual" of two years. After the statute has expired you must choose a team, or be randomly assigned one based on your hotness.
This goes for the girls too!

Being gay also makes you a diva. This entitles you to bitch, whine, complain and just generally piss and moan about how things/people are not up to your standards. This goes for the girls too! We are gay therefore we are allowed to be picky!

Gay "seniority" is determined by length of time you have been out not by age. This is a fact!
Nothing worse then being with a 40 year old who has been out for 6 months and is still behaving like an 18 year old or worse trying to drink and drug like one!!

The word fabulous is a word of gay creation. Straight men who use it more than twice in their life are automatically assumed to be homo by association.
However straight or women or lesbians who use it obviously have gay men as friends which socially accepted in the community.

An orgy is not considered a "group date".
Lesbians don’t mention this out aloud in company unless they want to be known as the town “bicycle”
Porn is for sharing.
Girls - Gay male porn is for sharing!

Pride is not compulsory, although nevertheless a Doctor's note is required for non-attendance.
Lesbians Agree!
Desperate Housewives, The Tudors and Brothers & Sisters are compulsory viewing.
“The L Word” “Oprah”, “Ellen Degeneres”, “Survivor” and “WWE Wrestling” (for the butches) , “the Fashion channel” ( because some of girls really do need some assistance!) are compulsory viewing.

Always consult to check what your friends are wearing before you leave the house, as inadvertently choosing the same outfit will make other people think you are a couple.
Girls please check the lastest hair styles and fashion, going out in a tack suit or having your hair in a mullet style is an absolute NO NO please consult your nearest gay man!!

Strange questions asked to lesbians/gay people!

In the last couple of years since coming out the closet, I have been asked some of the weirdest questions by heterosexual people, some have been ignorant, some have been intelligent, some have been curious and some have been darn right rude!
I am not sure why people ask such strange questions, we dont examine the lives of heterosexual people! There are times where I feel like a mouse in a scientific lab.

Do you have a secret handshake?

Don’t you want a real man?

Can I watch?

Can I join?

Once you have had me you will change

Is it easy to spot a gay person?

How do you do it?

Do you use toys?

What about penetration? lesbians dont experience 'real' penetration.

Is homosexual love the same as heterosexual love?

Is homosexuality natural?

How can lesbians and gay men be good parents?

How do they become parents?

Do gay people molest of recruit children?

Is there discrimination?

Why is there such self hatred?
A few years ago, you moved in with a woman, after leaving the a man. Do you find it easier living with a woman than a man because you have more in common?

You can use the same bathroom in movie theaters, for instance.

Can you share clothes?

Does she watch sports on TV?

Do you think of her as the male figure in the relationship?

Asked to me by a straight girl: am I your type? if I said No - she said - why not I am a woman! Do lesbians have types?

Where do lesbians meet other lesbians, at strip clubs?

Why do gay men act "weird"?

Do lesbians watch porn?

Its obvious how two women can be together, it because they like the same thing in bed right?

How do you know you are a lesbian?

I have this friend, who has this friend who is lesbian..are you erm single?

(assuming that all homo’s get along)

Being a lesbian is what you chose? (who the hell would choose this?)

Not sure whether I would answer these questions without A. wanting to smack them really hard over the head or B. Make a lot of fun out of these kinds of people or C. perhaps have some patience with their ignorance

Open relationships and Polyamory - what are they? do they work? I have so many questions!

I read an interesting article the other day about a lesbian couple who have been together for 7 years, they decided to open the relationship and bring other lovers into their relationship, it has made me think.
How does one have an open relationship? how do people swing?
We are taught by society and our parents that this is wrong, that there are other implications, what about emotions, loyalty and jealousy? Do humans have the capacity to love or be intimate with more than one person the sexual desires aside?
I wonder whether its fear of our emotions that stops us from these kind of relationships, or perhaps its selfishness, of course there is the worry in this day and age of STD's and aids.

Some opinions say that sometimes the balance of power is unequal in a relationship. It is your responsibility to yourself to move the gauge in a more advantageous direction.
do couples in long-term relationships that explore this as an alternative to separation?
I have heard that the relationships that last the longest are the ones that "never make promises." is this true?

What is the difference between and "NSA" relationship and an "Open relationship":

A “NSA” relationship infers that there is little to no feelings attached to whatever physical activities the two are engaged in. Meaning that there is absolutely no emotional or physical intimacy shared between the two, even if the two are occasionally naked together.

However, an open relationship implies the possibility there are feelings of attachment, caring and perhaps even a little or a lot of intimacy shared between the two. However they recognize that at this time, a closed, committed relationship would be doomed. So instead of throwing the baby out with the bath water, they agree to an open relationship.

Shouldn't this work?

Cat Quotes

This is Jack Daniels my beautiful, gorgeous cat!
I grew up with dogs but realized a few years ago that I am more of a cat person.
I think that one has to truly understand and be gentle with a cat, they have so much personality it just takes patience learning to appreciate them. They are very sensitive creature.

being gay and not having any human children I think we tend to dote on our fluffy "children" and spoil them rotten!

Found some really interesting cat quotes.

Cat Proverbs, Sayings & Quotes

You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats.
Colonial

In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.
English

No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens.
Abraham Lincoln

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
Mary Bly

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats.
Albert Schweitzer

Settling a dispute through the law is like losing a cow for the sake of a cat.
Chinese

A cat goes to a monastery, but still she remains a cat.
Congolese

The cat is a saint when there are no mice about.
Japanese

The cat is a lion to the mouse.
Albanian

A house without either a cat or a dog is the house of a scoundrel.
Portuguese

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner.
Hebrew

Handsome cats and fat dung heaps are the sign of a good farmer.
French

Beware of people who dislike cats.
Irish

Who cares well for cats will marry as happily as he or she could ever wish.
French

An old cat will not learn how to dance.
Moroccan

A cat will teach her young ones all the tricks, except how to jump backwards.
Netherlands Antillean

When the mouse laughs at the cat, there's a hole nearby.
Nigerian

As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.
Ellen Perry Berkeley

If you play with a cat, you must not mind her scratch.
Yiddish

To live long, eat like a cat, drink like a dog.
German

A cat has nine lives; for three he plays, for three he strays, and for the last three he stays.
English-American

A cat with a straw tail keeps away from fire.
English

Those that dislike cats will be carried to the cemetery in the rain!
Dutch

After dark all cats are leopards.
Native American (Zuni)

If stretching were wealth, the cat would be rich.
African

One should not send a cat to deliver cream
Yiddish

The cat--moon eats the gray mice of night.
Western Europe

When the cat's away, the mice will play.
Western Europe

It's for her own good that the cat purrs.
Irish

Cats don't catch mice to please Khoda(God).
Afgani

Fat cats and thin birds can share a yard, but thin cats and fat birds no way!
Rosicrucian

Like the cat in the tree, getting caught up in the chase can leave us in an awkward place.
Rosicrucian

The cat laps the moonbeams in the bowl of water, thinking them to be milk.
Zen Saying

If men were now to turn their hostility towards the cat, it would not be long before the domestic cat became a wild animal.
Nigeria

In even a cat the Buddha-nature exists.
Japanese Buddhist

It is useless to show the gold piece to a cat.
Zen Saying

Nature breaks through the eyes of the cat.
Irish

It's a brave bird that makes its nest in the cat's ear.
Hindi/Indian

A rat who gnaws at a cat's tail invites destruction.
Chinese

He who does not feed his cat will feed rats.

Dogs are dogs, but cats are people.

When the cat and mouse agree, the grocer is ruined.
Iranian

Beware of the cat that licks from the front but claws from behind.
Old English Proverb

A trapped cat becomes a lion.
Old English Proverb

Life's like cat vomit; if you don't clean it up right away, you're going to step in it.
Xnterna

Drowsing, they take the noble attitude of a great sphinx, who, in a desert land, sleeps always, dreaming dreams that have no end.
Charles Baudelaire

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
Mark Twain

One cat just leads to another.
Ernest Hemingway

The cat is nature's beauty.
French

The dream of cats is all mice.
Egyptian

I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.
Hippolyte Taine

No heaven will not ever Heaven be; unless my cats are there to welcome me.
Scottish

Dogs see people as companions; cats see people as staff.

It is better to feed one cat than many mice.
Norwegian

The cat does not negotiate with the mouse.
Robert K. Massie

You see, the wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.
Albert Einstein

When the cat is not home, the mice will dance on the table.
Dutch

When a Cat adopts you there is nothing to be done about it except put up with it until the wind changes.
T.S. Eliot

A cat in her house has the teeth of a lion.
Somali

A kitten can catch only a baby mouse.
Ghana

The naming of cats is a difficult matter. It isn't just one of your holiday games. You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter when I tell you a cat must have three different names...
T.S. Eliot

I love cats because I enjoy my home; and little by little, they become its visible soul.
Jean Cocteau

God is really only another artist. He invented the giraffe, the elephant and the cat. He has no real style, He just goes on trying other things.
Pablo Picasso

The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something that can be learned in no other way.
Mark Twain

What greater gift than the love of a cat?
Charles Dickens

do lesbians get the broody blues?

I was chatting one of my straight friends the other day and I mentioned that I was feeling quite broody of late as most of my straight friends are "matching and hatching", I was quite angry at what she came up with as to why I shouldn't as a gay woman have children.
here is the conversation with friend who has a kid:
me: "I am feeling quite broody lately"
friend: "really?" (with a frown in her voice)
me: "yes, really....I have been speaking to various people about the various options"
friend: "what does your partner say?"
me: "she is not that keen, she has nieces and nephews, we have a pet, we have each other what more do we need?"
friend: "hmmm......children are a huge commitment!! your life will change?"
me: "being in a relationship is a huge commitment, I want my life to change!"
friend: "your lifestyle of partying will stop"
me: "do you think at the age of over 30, I want to party all the time?"
friend goes onto to say (in a highly skeptical voice) that she does know gay people who have kids, but she does not give me much information about them....
why do I feel so judged for having normal motherhood feelings and emotions like any other mammal female? what gives straight people the right to feel that they are the only people in this world who must and can pro-create!!!!
here are some facts my friend:
How are the children conceived?
1. most of the research shows that it was not through heterosexual sex but other forms of insemination or adoption, most lesbian couples prefer if if given a choice to choose the donor.
Does the donor have to be part of the child's life?
This is usually at the descretion of the parents
Does one parent play the role of the mom and the other the dad?
What kind of question is that? its the same as asking whether one of the is the man and one is the woman? there are those couples that play the fem / butch roles but these days there are no roles and each parent will contribute their influences and backround into the relationship and to the child brought up in their home, as far as I am concerned I am a woman loving a woman, I am in a relationship with a woman and I do not want to be in a relationship with a man, why would I want a woman to portray herself as a man? according to research there is a lot of negotiation that takes place with regards to roles such as who carries the child, who takes the child to school etc but surely those are negotiations among straight parents too?
Who is the real mom?
most non-biological partners usually adopt the child so in fact both people are the child's legal parents.
What does the child call each 'mom'?
This depends on the parents and the child, sometimes 'mommy' and 'mom', sometimes first names.
what about a 'male' influence in the child's life?
I personally don't see any reason, why friends, cousins, uncles or grandparents should not be able to fit this bill?

As far as I am concerned its not the means of having the child its raising it to be good, kind and compassionate in a world that is misunderstood, cruel and unreasonable.

My New Purchase

I have decided to start with my new purchase: a 4rth generation ipod nano, 8G.
Being a techno kid who absolutely loves music, I have always wanted but sometimes could not afford the lastest "music" gadget.
After looking at thousands of internet sites and sending my manager on a window shopping, pricing trip while he was overseas, as well as doing window shopping at the stores myself, I even went as far as looking through all that useless advertising that you receive in the post.
I finally got a friend of a friend to bring me one from Canada!

This is someone elses review and I will comment:
The good: The fourth-generation iPod Nano is more attractive and colorful than its predecessor and includes Apple's new Genius playlist tool, a tilt sensor, and accessibility features for the visually impaired
I quite like the search facility, I havent quite got to use the genius playlist tool but the alarm clock, games, and stopwatch are very useful!

The bad: To use the new Nano, you must upgrade to Apple's iTunes 8 software with its laundry list of hardware requirements; the rounded screen invites glare; sound quality is only average.
itunes is not such a bad piece of software although I do wish I didnt have to use itunes and I could use any other software, I am yet to experience the glare, and the sound quality is good depending on the earphones you are using.
my irritation is the fact that I cannot find a compatible wall changer or a decent docking station for it as these things are yet to come onto the market?

It is a gorgeous little toy, I take it everywhere with me and it now has 1,435 songs on it from 1960-the new millenium!
and since this is a blog about lesbian stuff! its a lesbian must, especially for those poorer of us who dont have a car stereo, who's stereo has been ripped out of our cars or for drowning out nagging boring girlfriends and partners!!

since my last blog.....

This Lesbian has gone through so many things in since her last blog, firstly its the new year 2009 with all its new hopes and prospects (well we hope there will be new prospects, particularly money and business wise)

I got my cat back from my ex ( officially called jack daniels the 'baggage' cat),

I purchased my 4rth generation ipod nano

I spent some of the beginning of the year watching the 5th Season of the L word,

I have a new little being in our extended family (this came with a whole lot of emotions for me),

And I am finally going to Europe for the first time in my life!!

so many things to talk about - which do I begin with???